Staying alive

juli 11, 2010 kl. 1:39 f m | Publicerat i Skrivande | Lämna en kommentar

As I leaned out my window, singing Depeche Mode´s ”Sometimes” from the ”Black Celebration” album, I felt calm and confident.

There was no reason to leave this world.

I was ok. The world was ok. Actually, most things seemed ok.

Perhaps I wasn’t God’s gift to women. Nevertheless, I had something to give.

The rewriting of the rewriting of the rewriting of the first chapter of my novel was done. There was a character for whom you could feel empathy or sympathy. You would also want to know what would happen to her.

I was far from my goal, but on my way.

And it really didn’t matter if I would die soon. The victory was in the writing itself, not the publishing and sales.

The caveman on the beach who draw a picture in the sand was happy with what he had accomplished, even though an hour later nothing of his creation remained.

We live.

We lust.

We die.

There is no answer to the why.

Håkan Tendell


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